TurningPointe Press

Moira McCauley's 2010 letterpress calendarMy, what a difference a decade makes. On January 1, 2000 my life could not have been more different. I was completely lost on all fronts of my life and floundering. Worst of all, I'd lost myself and wasn't ready to admit it. I spent the first decade of the new millennium digging myself out of a huge hole. 

In retrospect, I feel no shame - this was a necessary passage, part of designing an intentional and authentic life. The gift for me in 2009 was that I uncovered my compassion. For myself and for others, particularly for people with whom I've struggled or who have hurt me. At the risk of sounding like a cliche or new-age self-help book: they've been my greatest teachers.

I spent much of the last decade doing. In the words of my friend and gifted writer Joanne Lozar Glenn, I was more of a human doing than a human being, going out with a bang at the end of 2009 by over-doing too much of a good thing. This distinction comes to mind as I contemplate a new year, a new decade.

And I turn back to a still older friend, Simple Abundance. This book was a lifeline in the early 2000s, given to me twice (I really needed it, but ignored it the first time) by my BFF Mandy. I recently pulled it out again as a touchstone after the dust settled this December from my whirlwind fall. Abundance, yes - but not at all simple. Time to go back to the basics that I know work for me. Once I got past my "I'm over this" and "boy, this is corny" resistance, I'm finding the daily meditations refreshing and packed with new meaning at this point in my life.

This morning's journaling revealed a slightly different twist on New Year's intentions: instead of diving into the yummy pile of exhibition calls and residency applications I've been saving for this very day, I'm intentionally setting them aside for today. Instead, I'm pondering what simple abundance might look like for me in 2010.

• one thing at at time
• belief in a generous universe that won't be stingy with opportunities and joy (therefore, no need to grab, rush and do)
• owning my artist self and let her shine through an original and authentic voice
• listening deeply to myself and others
• not having an agenda
• doing things in service of what's good and what will make a difference
• living generously (with myself and others)
• saying no appropriately and early on

Happy New Decade, to you, too!

My acupuncturist, Pilar - a true healer, had her hands full with me yesterday. Apparently, I was still in overdrive from this fall's over committed pace. An unrelenting surge of creativity and productive energy wouldn't be such a problem much of the year, but this time of "water" in traditional Chinese medicine (TCM) is supposed to be a period of deep rest and recovery. 

Everything has a natural cycle: birth, growth, harvest, decline. Every 24 hours. Every 12 months. Every life. For me, TCM offers a natural and intuitive way to gauge my wellbeing. In the three years since working with Pilar, I've become increasingly aware of these cycles and try to honor them. This fall, I knew that I was pushing it, contradicting what nature asked in the season of "metal:" eliminate, let go, slow down.

Like an over-revved engine, I couldn't stand down, possibly explaining my first-ever migraine, churning thoughts, and reluctance to do as little as possible, while feeling generally worn out despite plenty of sleep.

So Pilar put me into "water," with instructions to lie reasonably low until mid-February. Do what I must to keep life on track, but no new major projects. To burst forth with fresh, abundant creative energy come Spring, I've got to let things run their natural course.